Not a Quaker?

How many times do I say perhaps I am not a Quaker?

Probably every day.

I know that

• I don't feel guilty when I buy a  lottery ticket.
• I sometimes buy a raffle ticket and do not think that either of these things contribute to excess gambling by me or others.
• I dont regard myself as a Christian although I try to live with Loving Kindness.
• I sometimes wonder whether war is inevitable although I work for peace and harmony.
• I sometimes criticise my fellow Quaker Meeting Members and feel angry with them.
• I dont always feel accepted by the Meeting
• I feel sometimes that intellectualising is all that Quakers do and that they ignore the intuitive side of the personality. I prefer to be a Quaker Healer, whatever that is. Mostly healing myself.
• I cannot solve all of the problems that Members of the Meeting put forward, I am not on everybody's page in the Quaker song sheet.
• I think the phrase herding cats is very apt.

I have been a Member for about 25 years. Why do I still go on Sunday to Meeting, come rain or shine?

 I feel a real presence in Meeting when I centre down .  Meeting for Worship revives and refreshes me and helps me carry on, carrying on. Sometimes when I am in need, words come into my mind that help to nourish and confirm me and find a way out of a problem. Sometimes there is ministry that speaks to my condition, and those about me. And, that ,I think is where the strength of Quakers lies.